Stuff White People Like 11-20

This is a continuation of my completely useless series on:

Stuff White People Like

...A Blog that happens to ring too true....at times....

and yes, I am white..lily white..

Here is....

Part One

Now on with the show..

#11 Asian Girls

"95% of white males have at one point in their lives, experienced yellow fever."

Well this is just odd. I... don't know what to even say to this. I think I will leave it up to the men.

#12 Non-Profit Organizations

"It is a known fact that white people make up 95% of non-profit organizations. They can’t get enough of them.

They like working there for a number of reasons, the most important of which is that it gives them a sense of self importance. This is important so that they can tell their friends and parents that they are “helping” society, and not just working to make money.

But the sweet side of non profits is that you are paid a competitive salary for your field. So you can be working at a non-profit and still make six figures, and you don’t have accountability or pressure. Again, like most things with white people - you can’t lose!"

I copied the entire post. ...and..quite frankly I find this to be extremely sad. I honestly do not offend easily.. I am from the school that says people who are easily offended are looking for things to be offended about......but this.....slightly offends me. Are they saying the millions of people who work under the top hoohas also get paid? There are millions upon millions of people who work for FREE.... I have never met anyone who got paid for doing their Org work, yet I have met hundreds who never got paid and used their own resources to continue the efforts out of the goodness of their hearts.. To the Girl Scouts, Blood Drives, SPCAs, Clothing Drive People and more...I salute you for doing the work because it was in your white heart to do the work..or whatever color you may have been.......

#13 Tea

"And now people are into Green Tea, Chamomile, Chai, White Tea, Red Tea, Jasmine Tea, Oolong Tea, Black Tea, Orange Pekoe, and other specialty blends. They are even opening stores and websites devoted to sending white people all sorts of tea"

Asian people don't drink tea? Should I go on?

#14 Having Black Friends

"The number of black friends white people possess also illustrates their comfort with black culture. Here’s a handy guide to the number system:

1—The white novice. This black friend is the gateway to helping white people understand gang signs and Vietnamese beauty supply stores. This black friend is probably the only black friend for many white people and when they all hang out (because white people hang out) they bring their “mutual” black friend with them.

2—The white black club-goer. Two black friends serve as bodyguards when white people go to black clubs to see how exactly one “pops, drops and locks” it.

3 -4—The white BET-er. See Justin Timberlake/ Robin Thicke/ Jon B for more information. For old school reference, see Michael McDonald.

5 and up—Impossible."

I am finding this whole 11-20 thing to be quite boring. My first 3 best friends as a child were black, 3 of my children also had first best friends, plural, that were black..obviously there are no issues about having black friends, although I did not tell my kids to go out and make them their friends either..I don't have any black friends now to speak of that I see often....and I would find it sad that anyone would want violent friends...what's my point? I don't have one. I find #14 goofy.

#15 Yoga

"Yoga is also an expensive activity. It gives white people the chance to showcase their $80 pants. The cost of four yoga classes is equal to the amount of money it would take to pay for uniforms and travel costs of an AAU Basketball team in the inner city. Lastly like other stuff that white people like, yoga feels exotic and foreign (ties into post #2 about eastern religions) and deep down in some way, white people feel that participation makes up for years of colonial rule in India."

I would love to take yoga...unfortunately, I can't afford to.

#16 “Gifted” Children

"White people love “gifted” children, do you know why? Because an astounding 100% of their kids are gifted! Isn’t that amazing?

I’m pretty sure the last non-gifted white child was born in 1962 in Reseda, CA. Since then, it’s been a pretty sweet run.

The way it works is that white kids that are actually smart are quickly identified as “gifted” and take special classes and eventually end up in college and then law school or med school.

But wait, aren’t there white people who aren’t doctors or lawyers, or even all that smart?

Well, here is another one of those awesome white person win-win situations.

Because if a white kid gets crappy grades and can’t seem to ever do anything right in school, they are still gifted! How you ask? They are just TOO smart for school. They are too creative, too advanced to care about the trivial minutiae of the day to day operations of school."

Mmm..sorry, I see plenty of white trash that isn't gifted and I call it like I see it....drugs, lack of family unit, parental guidance and inbred breeding...does not a gifted child make..

I have four "gifted" children thank you very much and I will show the test scores to anyone to prove it. Oh, and guess what? They are also required to be well behaved and assets to the community. I know..a novel idea.

#17 Hating their parents

"But take note that this hatred can be used for gain. White people love to talk about how much they hate their parents, so if you are in a situation where you need to gain a white person’s trust, ask them about their parents. But under no circumstances should you try to one up them, regardless of whether or not you were an orphan, abused, or watched your parents get shot. If you bring this up, the white person will never talk to you about their problems again, and you will be unable to gain their trust."

So, do I dare say what I am really thinking? ....

#18 Awareness

"An interesting fact about white people is that they firmly believe that all of the world’s problems can be solved through “awareness.” Meaning the process of making other people aware of problems, and then magically someone else like the government will fix it. This belief allows them to feel that sweet self-satisfaction without actually having to solve anything or face any difficult challenges."

Well, sad to say I agree here. Too much talk and not enough walk...but is this a white thing? Dunno. I'm not exactly seeing other races fixing the problems before white people are making others aware of them...

#19 Traveling

"White person travelling can be broken into two categories - First World and Third World.

First world is Europe and Japan, and man, this travel is not only beloved but absolutely essential in their development as white people.

The second type of white person travel is Third World. This is when they venture to Thailand, Africa or South America. Some do it so that they can one up the white people who only go to Europe."

Well this is odd. I love to travel...but I don't particularly want to go to any of these places. Gawd..I hate questioning my race. What do you call it when you are an American white person who feels they should see all there is to see in America first?

#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture

"White people are pretty conflicted about their culture. On one hand, they are proud of the art, literature, and film produced by white culture. But at the same time, they are very ashamed of all the bad things in white culture: the KKK, colonialism, slavery, Jim Crow laws, feudalism, and the treatment of native americans."

No. No. ....No...I am not. I am completely proud of what America stands for and do not feel an ounce of guilt over anything I did not do nor the color of my skin. I was born white, I did not choose it but I do choose what I do and how I behave...I feel sorry for any race that does not hold themselves accountable their own thoughts, judgments, and blame while not being able to let go and move on. I really wish there was a way of going back and undoing all the *horrific* things white people have done..with the ability to see what would have happened over time instead.....oh yes. I am sure everything would be perfect for everyone.